Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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