I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
