sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
