Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
