Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
