you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
