Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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