Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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