She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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