Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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