I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
