she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
How external is "for external use only"?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
