You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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