I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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