That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize