she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Randomize
