well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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