its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
