eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I intend to get homeless drunk
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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