How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
