After last night, I could never be a politician.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize