just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
i believe in u and ur pee
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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