Im at strip club and am horny
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
