I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
40s are totally the cure
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Randomize
