using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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