a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
