I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
