he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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