She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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