im six kinds of drunk right now
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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