chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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