dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
