operation harelip BJ is a go
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
He did a backflip because drugs
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize