I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
