I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
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