Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
This baby is an asshole
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
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