Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
