i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
