I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Jerry, you need to find god
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
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