Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
