But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
