oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
