When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
