is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize