if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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