Betty ford says i'm here all night
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize