Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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