thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
