Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
whose parrot is this?
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
