Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize